by desing | Faith & Purpose
You ever faced a dead situation?
A situation that looks so impossible that you don’t believe that there is any way that it can change?
Or you been waiting and waiting and waiting for something to change in your life and it looks like it’s never going to happen.
What do you do when you’re faced with a challenge that seems so much bigger than anything you’ve ever dealt with?
I can actually telling you because I’m facing one of those situations and as a matter of fact, I would not be here if my mother had listened to the doctors who told her I was “dead” in her womb.
See when my mother was a few months pregnant with me, she went to the doctor and they told her the her pregnancy had made a tragic turn for the worse. They urged her to schedule an abortion because the baby inside of her was not going to make it.
What did my mother do? Well, she went home, got on her knees and prayed. My mother is no praying woman, she just humbled herself and believed that there was a God who could help her so she cried out for His help. In that moment, she felt me kick. Well look at God!
I have another one for ya!
Have you ever heard the testimony of the gospel singer, Travis Greene? You might know him from hit songs like “Intentional.” Well, did you know that he too was in a “dead” situation. When he was 4 years old, he fell out of a 4-story window. His body laid on the floor and the white sheets covered him. His mother picked up his lifeless, little body and cried out to God knowing that only He has the power to raise any dead person, situation or problem…Travis wakes up.
But that’s not even the best part of the story! A few days after he gets released from the hospital. Little Travis tells his mother, “Mommy, I have to tell you what happened to me when I fell.” His mother urges him not to talk about it because the doctors warned that Travis may experience shock. However, Travis insists. So Mom decides to listen.
He says, “Mommy, when I fell, I never hit the ground – a big hand caught me before I hit the ground. Then I saw a big man who saved me and he asked me whether I wanted to go with him or to go back to my mommy. I told him that I wanted to come back to my mommy. Then He told me that he would take me back to my mommy. Then I asked him. ‘Excuse me sir, what’s your name?’ He says…my name is Jesus.”
I know this may seem unorthodox or not politically correct but there is so much power that God has that we’re not tapping into. We have so much unbelief and doubt going on that we have more faith in what we see or what we scroll through than in God. And we wonder why we don’t see miracles anymore?
I’m not sure what dead situation you’re faced with but I have been sent to tell you that God will turn it around.
Let me keep it real with you. I don’t write these posts just to write them. I pray and ask God to use me as a vessel to send a message to His daughters. Even as I write this, He’s the one telling me to include the testimony about my mother and Travis Greene. I wanted to write something else but I’m being led by Him to get to you – God loves you that much that He wants you to know that He is right there in it with you!
Yesterday my pastor also shared a testimony that I want to share with you. A few years ago, he felt an unction in His spirit to go and pray for a man who had just been a part of pipe explosion and whose burns covered his entire body. The doctors, nurses and everyone else around him had lost hope. They had written him off and were only making him comfortable in the hospital until the inevitable came. As my pastor was on his way to pray for the hopeless situation, he felt an unction in his spirit to simply thank God for his healing.
He goes into the hospital room and he does just that, thanks God for his healing. Within ONE WEEK, the man’s condition SUDDENLY take a drastic turn for the BETTER!
One week!
A few weeks later, he walks out of that hospital. Not only that but he also won a lucrative settlement case against Con Edison for the damages from the explosion.
I believe that sometimes God allows things to die in our lives in order to show up and do the impossible to demonstrate His love for us and to restore us to an even greater reward.
God answers your prayers because of His love for you. Every answered prayer, every dead situation brought back to life is a manifestation of His love for you.
Miracles are manifestation of God’s love for you.
God does not take any pleasure in seeing you suffer, crying, in lack, hurting, lonely, depressed, sick or losing.
So whatever looks dead, it’s NOT OVER!
To let you into what’s been going on with me…I too am facing a dead situation. God gave me a promise about something 2 years ago and by the looks of things, it looks dead with the nail in the coffin. I was so discouraged, crying and worrying until I started speaking to some of the elders in my life.
Each and everyone of them told me the same thing which was this – I have the power of God with my faith and my words to turn things in my favor. I had to start applying everything I knew – praying in faith, declaring and decreeing God’s promises out loud, thanking God in advance for the manifestation and most of all – not to give into fear, not be distracted with what I’m seeing and stay focused on Who my help comes from.
Then I got excited. I changed my mind! God allowed it to get it like this so now He can take over, so now I can know that it was nothing but His love for me, His power that brought back to life the very promise that He gave me.
When you keep looking at the dead situation, it will only scare you. But if you take your eyes off your problem and onto your God then you will encourage your faith.
You can’t just sit there and cry about it anymore. Get up. Pray in faith. Command your blessings to come to you. But this is the one thing that you need while doing this…
Confidence!
You have to have full confidence in the words you’re speaking and the God you’re serving. It doesn’t matter what you say, if you don’t believe it then it’s a waste of time.
What helps me is believing God’s love for me and that He wants it for me more than I do. God wants to do it for you!
Will you believe in His love for you to resurrect that dead situation?
If you do, then it’s not over! As a matter of fact, it’s just the beginning! Have confidence…
by desing | Faith & Purpose
I know you’re probably familiar with something called an “a ha” moment. Oprah coined the phrase a few years ago and according to Dictionary.com it is a point in time, event or experience when one has a sudden insight or realization.
I’ve had many of these moments as I’m sure that you have as well. Nevertheless, this past weekend I had one of those moments that was not just an “a ha” moment but this was a defining moment. I had a sudden realization that took so much unnecessary weight off of my shoulders. Not only did it hit me, but I know that it’s probably something many of the women I know and motivate need to know.
While watching Iyanla Vanzant’s, Iyanla Fix My Life, she said something powerful to someone she was counseling.
She says “It is unkind, it is unloving to yourself to be hard on yourself when you are learning to do something that no one has taught you to do.”
Wow!
How many of us are learning to do something that we’ve never learned how to do, nor have we had it modeled for us, nor do we have access to resources or relationships to get it done and yet and still, we beat ourselves up for not getting it right, every time.
Beloved, don’t be unkind or unloving to yourself any longer.
How many of us were raised by a broken generation where our mothers may not have shown us the tools and resources to become women? How many of us really know about womanhood or manhood when generations before us may not have known much about it either as they were raised by another broken generation? We may know how to cook, pay our bills, work hard, be responsible, clean our homes and be “strong” – which in times can be a curse as we think that being “strong” is acting like we have it all together, all of the time no matter how ugly the situation really is. Is that really strength? And then we wonder why so many of us are breaking down. Did you know that suicide is the leading cause of death for millennials?
Or better yet. How many of us grew up in an environment where there was no such thing as going after your dreams? How many of grew up neighborhoods where we were surrounded by poverty or hopelessness? How many of us have grown up in homes where working for a job that you hate but pays the bills for 20 years in order to get a pension and retire is considered the creme de la creme of the American dream?
How many of us come from broken families where we never witnessed a healthy marriage relationship? How many of us grew up in hostile environments where there was abuse or addiction that tore your childhood apart?
So now here you are…25, 30, 35, 40 years later trying to learn how to become a woman where what may informs your perception on womanhood may be your upbringing, pop culture or social media. But what if the philosophy that you’re learning from is a philosophy based on failure? How can you really learn about womanhood when you may have not had anyone to teach you?
Perhaps you’re trying to break the chains of generational poverty and you’ve decided to build a business. You’re all about making your dreams come true – no matter how hard it gets. Of course you’re going to make mistakes along the way! You’ve never had anyone model that for you so why are you going to be unkind to yourself and beat yourself up when you miss the mark?
You may be trying to or want to raise children in a healthy, happy home. You want to be a fabulous wife and a powerful mom – but you never even witnessed something like that. Of course, you’re going to make some mistakes girl!
I know that as a woman, we can be so hard on ourselves. Our greatest enemy are the thoughts that debilitate us into remaining broken, little girls because many of our mothers and fathers are broken girls and boys who did the best that they could with what they had.
I want you to forgive yourself. I want you to forgive yourself for expecting to have all the answers about everything. I want you to forgive yourself for thinking that you need to have it all together, all of the time. I want you to stop being hard on yourself as you learn to do something that no one has taught you how to do.
No one may have taught you how to be a healthy, confident, whole woman of faith. No one may have taught you how to think, speak and attract success. No one may have taught you how to be a great mother. No one may have taught you how to become a wife. No one may have taught you how to build a powerful business or how to build a financial legacy of wealth.
But guess what? You’ve decided to do it! And as you learn, you’re going to be able to teach, mentor and guide others how to do what you’ve done. That’s going to be your legacy!
So if you don’t know anything about scaling a business then read books about it and attend conferences. If you don’t know about having a healthy, happy marriage or anything about being a wife (not a girlfriend as there is a HUGE difference), then set up coffee dates with women who can guide you. You can actually listen to my latest podcast episode on Becoming a Wife here. If you don’t know about building wealth then download podcasts on wealth building or watch helpful YouTube videos.
Go to counseling, therapy, get a coach, ask someone to be a mentor – start to do what you can to learn and become the woman you’ve been predestined to be. You can download my courses on womanhood, goals, positive thinking and join my private Embrace Her Legacy Facebook group here.
Then the best thing that you can do is to simply pray and ask God for help. God loves you and is on your side. The very hairs on your head are numbered by Him! Ask Him to help you learn to do whatever it is that you’re trying to accomplish. He may often allow a circumstance that He’ll use as a tool to help you grow.
Once you pray, surrender it. God is not mad at you for the mistakes you’ve made along the way. He only has good thoughts about you! Yes, God only has good thoughts about you that can’t even be numbered – they outnumber the grains of sand! Did you catch that?
So if God only has good thoughts about you, I think it’s only right to have good thoughts about yourself. No more being unkind to yourself…
XOXO,
Maria I. Melendez
Founder & CEO
Embrace Her Legacy
by desing | Faith & Purpose
Fear isn’t anything to play with. But yet, it has such stronghold on many of us and we don’t even know it. Have you ever been taunted with fearful thoughts? How does it feel?
Not good!
Palms are sweaty. Chest caves in. Your soul feels like it’s in a knot.
This is not normal.
There comes a point where you have to declare war on fear because if you haven’t noticed, fear has already declared war on you without your permission. It’s up to you to sit there and take it or to fight back.
You know what the scary thing about fear is?
It has the power to manifest exactly what you fear to become reality in your life. The more you fear it, the power you give it to operate in your life. Fear gives the opportunity for all the negative to come to fruition. Every time you meditate on fear – you are giving fear, negative and evil forces the authority to work in your life.
I don’t know about you but I have NO time for it anymore. If you’ve been losing, ask yourself if there is any form of fear that you’re meditating on that you’ve allowed to produce fruits of fear in your life.
The opposite of fear is indeed faith. But I got to keep it all the way real with you, it doesn’t stop there. I had the hugest “a ha” moment the other day when I realized that I had “half way faith”, I had faith in myself, in things, in money, in what other people would tell me instead of having faith in the only being who can do the impossible on my behalf…that’s God.
I started to take my eyes off of the opposition and my eyes off every thing that I had mistakenly put my trust in and started to magnify and put my trust in God. Not only did I magnify Him but I had to put my faith in His love for me. It’s not just faith that we need, it’s faith in the love that God has for us.
Faith and love will overcome any fear but it’s contingent on your perspective. Your opposition may be an opportunity for you to grow in your faith and see the impossible happen on your behalf.
But because fear has declared war on you, you have to do what any soldier does – develop a strategy to defeat your opposition.
Whatever it is that you really, really want – along with working diligently towards it – you are going to have to fight the negative energy that has been set in place to try to knock you out before you see it happening.
Like I said in a previous post, it’s time for you to war differently. Your opposition knows exactly what to do to get under your skin because you’ve been studied. Are you going to continue to sit there and let all hell break lose in your life or are you going to do something different this time?
Let be real with you…it doesn’t matter what goals you’re working towards because if you don’t have the mindset and character to maintain the responsibility of those goals then it’s never going to happen. If you can’t believe that you can trust God to take care of you while you make a leap of faith of purpose then how will you believe that God will provide income for you and a staff of 25 employees for your dream business. We go from faith to faith.
Maybe you’re being delayed in seeing your breakthrough because you’ve allowed your mind to be controlled by fear, doubt, negative, suspicious, judgment and unbelief. Maybe God wants to give you the desires of your heart but you fail to believe that He can.
Don’t limit the power of God. Do you know that He loves you? Do you believe that He’s on your side? Have you limited His power to work on your behalf?
I have a confession to make. I realized that my mind has been infested with doubtful, fearful and anxious thoughts because I didn’t really have the right perspective of God. Until you change your perspective of God then you’ll keep experiencing the God that you perceive.
God is love – like all about love. The great part is that His love isn’t contingent on what you do first, He loves you unconditionally. There is nothing you can do today or tomorrow to get God to love you any more than He already does. Not only does God loves you, He likes you. It’s His great pleasure to give you the desires of your heart – He will never give up on you!
There I was asking God to do mighty miracles but I kept thinking in a way that opposed the very thing I was praying for.
The strategy to win against fear includes thinking on thoughts on what you want, thinking positively and thinking the promises of God. What I mean on the promises of God are Scriptures that speak into your situation. You can’t believe God if you don’t know His promises. You can’t win over fear if you don’t know the power that you have working for you.
So the first step is to substitute thoughts.
Then you have to start speaking out loud what you want to see and those promises. I’m not saying to ignore whatever you’re facing but instead of getting on the phone and telling everyone how “broke” you are or you’re never going to get married or you’ll never get promoted – speak out a positive affirmation. Every time you speak negatively, you are predicting your own future!
Use your words to change your situation. Your words are spirit, filled with power! Use them to your advantage. This is bigger than calling things into existence, this is a call to confess what God says and can do about your situation. So instead of “I’m broke” say “I know I can trust God’s power to supply everything that I need.” Instead of “I have no clients” say “I know God can open doors that no one can shut and prosper me. I can trust Him to accelerate my business.” Instead of looking at the guys you’re dating with no hope, say “God, I know you’re sending the right person to me right now.” Every time a nagging thought of fear comes nagging in your mind, speak your power words out loud – yes every time.
So my challenge for you is to write down a list of affirmations that you will speak out every morning. This is only if you’re serious and you want to get out whatever season of lack, wilderness, loneliness, sickness, delay that you’re in. A lot of us are waiting on God not realizing that we have a part to play in going to the next level.
Write down where you’ve been struggling with fear the most and determine what is it that you’re opposition is after. Whatever is being attacked the most in your life is a HUGE indicator of where your destiny lies and what your opposition is afraid of most.
I don’t think you know how dangerous you’ll become when you become a woman grounded in faith because nothing will be impossible to you and you’ll set out to do any and everything! This is what your opposition is after…are you going to keep allowing fear to win or will you create your battle plan for victory – which you already have btw.
You can start by downloading my courses on Defeating Fear and Developing a Winning Mindset here where I help you create your plan. I think $12 is worth it, start to see yourself as victorious and you will be!
XOXO,
Maria I. Melendez
Founder & CEO
Embrace Her Legacy
@embraceherlegacy
by desing | Faith & Purpose
If you haven’t noticed, I’ve been a little quiet for the past few days. I’m actually coming off from celebrating my 32nd birthday and I needed to take some much needed time to reflect.
Isn’t it funny how you can think that all is well in your life until something happens to reminds you of your weaknesses and frailty as a woman? I don’t know about you but I have a problem being “weak” or making mistakes; like most of us I have been deceived into thinking that I have to be strong all of the time at all costs in order to protect myself. But what I’ve learned is that desire to pursue perfection is nothing but another form of bondage.
You are not perfect nor will you ever be and the desire to walk in perfection is often rooted in fear – the fear of rejection, disappointment, pain or judgement. That’s when I was reminded that “perfect love casts out all fear.” God’s love for you is greater than your fears.
Whatever it is that you may fear, I want you know that every time you meditate on it in your mind, you are giving that fear the power to manifest in your life. There comes a point where you have to make the decision to grow from being a girl to becoming a woman – and that doesn’t happen when you buy your first home, move into your first apartment, get married or have children – becoming a woman happens when you decide to mature.
All change in your life begins with a decision and is followed by a process.
One of the things I realized in my solitude and after a series of events that transpired over the last few days was that I was thinking like a “scared girl” instead of like the woman of God that I know that I am. I was still allowing the same fears to plague me. I was still giving room for negative thinking in my life because I was allowing what I see to frustrate my faith. I recognized that I was allowing the opposition that I’ve experienced to steal my faith and challenge the beliefs that I had about God, His promises for me, my dreams and my destiny.
While sitting at the kitchen table in the home of one of my dear friends and mentors, she looks to me and says this, “Maria, it’s time to grow up. It’s time to make the decision to mature. You can’t fight this battle the way you’ve been doing and you need to make that decision tonight.” I didn’t understand what she meant until she prayed for me and all of a sudden I felt the overwhelming presence of God unction me to let go of all fears and no longer be intimidated by whatever opposition I was being faced with. In that moment, I magnified God’s power and promises instead of my circumstances. I started to declare with my mouth what it was that God has promised me. I declared that I would see every promise made to me realized…in spite of whatever the giant in front of me was trying to intimidate me into thinking.
Here’s the thing. Your opposition knows you very well and will keep attacking the same areas in your life because it knows it can get a reaction out of you or better yet, get you to participate in your own demise and sabotage yourself.
Where is it in your life that you keep getting tempted to quit? What is it that’s intimidating you that doesn’t allow you to consistently fight and believe? What scary thing is screaming and taunting at you telling you that it’s never going to happen?
Perhaps you grew up in a broken home and your scary giant is telling you that you’ll never meet your husband and build a happy life together. Perhaps you’ve submitted your manuscript to 25 publishers and your giant is telling you that your book will never get published and you keep giving into defeat. Maybe your health has taken a toll and your giant is telling you that you’re not going to make it. Maybe you’ve been contemplating suicide because you’ve lost all hope that your situation can get any better. Maybe your brother who is addicted to drugs is on his 3rd stint in rehab and you don’t believe that things will ever change for him.
Maybe your boss keeps triggering your nerves and the hopes for that promotion are slim to none and you keep crying about it. Maybe you want to take that leap of faith to start that business but your bank account is screaming “You can’t make it happen”, so you keep reporting to a job that you hate in tears. Maybe you keep reacting to the same people who spread lies about you by yelling, screaming and going off the handle instead of growing up and walking away.
I don’t know what’s been triggering you lately. I don’t know what fear has you in bondage. I don’t know what giant is screaming at you in the middle of the night causing nightmares but this is a message for you to serve notice on that giant and make a decision to grow up and mature in how you choose to respond to those triggers.
Your enemy is going to attack the same places over and over again until he doesn’t get a reaction out of you. Until you pass the test, you will never progress to the next level. And the change happens in your mind first. You can’t wait until you are married to become a wife…start thinking like one in spite of what your current love life looks like. You can’t wait until you see a multi-million dollar business until you believe that you can build one…start to believe that your hair-care business is already on sale at every Walgreen’s. You can’t wait until your boss stops nagging you until you believe that you have that promotion…believe that corner office is yours anyway.
Girls are easily rattled by whatever opposition they experience. They give into their emotions and lack discipline. As a result of that lack of discipline, girls experience unnecessary pain that weighs tons instead of the pain of discipline that weighs ounces. Girls “clap back” to any little insult, are stricken with fear and are easily offended.
Women know how to manage their emotions. Women know that if God is for me, who dare be against me? Women believe in spite of what they see or feel nor is she easily offended. Women are not easily swayed by momentary feelings or discouragement, we understand that we have a battle to fight that’s so much greater than ourselves. Women don’t feel the need to vindicate themselves because they know that God will always step in and do what only He can. A woman trusts her God and believes His promises.
Don’t feel crazy either because I didn’t know I had little girl tendencies until a few days ago but I made the decision to mature and change my thinking. Just like my sis told me, I’m telling you…it’s time to make the decision to grow up!
XOXO,
Maria I. Melendez
Founder & CEO
Embrace Her Legacy
@embraceherlegacy
by desing | Faith & Purpose
If you know me and my story, you know that I’ve accomplished a lot. From landing my dream job turned beautiful nightmare in the music industry to taking a leap of faith into my purpose to start Embrace Her Legacy to becoming an author, motivational speaker, spiritual teacher, host of the Embrace Her Legacy podcast and creator of all our personal development programs You might know that I’ve been featured in ESSENCE, Latina, Heart & Soul and others. Not to mention, I have a powerful network of supporters that include influencers, leaders, executives and key tastemakers…one of these supporters have been my best friend Irene.
I wanted to tell you Irene’s story because I would not be who I am without her.
Irene grew up in the projects of East New York, Brooklyn. The both of us like to have fun so when we met in our teen years it was nothing for us to have a few drinks, but Irene would take it overboard sometimes and get out of control. I would ask her why she partied so hard, smoked so much weed and drank so much. She let me know that she grew up in that environment. Her entire family drank and alcoholism ran ramped in her family. As a matter of fact, she shared that one of her most earliest memories was of her father being passed out drunk with her in the park. He fell asleep on the bench and left her there but a friendly stranger walked her home. Luckily as she was walking home. Irene’s brother and mother were on their way to the park to look for her. She told me that her father’s binges on alcohol like this were common in her childhood as she would have to go looking for him at local liquor stores but she knew that he loved her. A few years ago her father was delivered from alcoholism so we can praise God for that one.
But as a result of her father’s alcoholism, being from the projects and having a mother that never made her feel good enough out of her own insecurities, Irene always carried shame but you could never tell. She always wore the hottest clothes, had the latest Jordan’s and wore the biggest smile. All of our friends envied her. Until one day while were in the 11th grade, Irene had a failed suicide attempt. She was carrying so much pain and didn’t want to deal with it anymore. I asked her why she did it and she said that she always felt lonely and misunderstood – she was crying for help.
But she got her act together as a friend told her in the hospital room that God had her here for a reason and her life had purpose. She never heard that before so she never forgot it. We ended up going to college together but those feelings of shame and low self-worth followed her so she did anything to find meaning, approval and validation. She would drink, smoke, party and boy did she have a thing for guys. It was nothing for her to have guys fall in love with her left and right, she found validation out of all the guys she dated and slept with, it gave her a sense of power.
We both graduated and went our own ways after college but those feelings of shame kept following Irene. She had this amazing job but she was still looking for meaning and validation – the drinking had gotten worse, she tried to make more money to heal her wounds of shame and never feeling good enough, the addiction to weed had excelled and she was even arrested for it!
She still wasn’t fulfilled. She never ever felt that she was good enough because of being from the projects and she carried shame from the regretful decisions of her past. She had a dream to start her own business but she feared being ridiculed by her family, failure and the cost she would have to pay to live her dreams. But we encouraged each other to finally pursue our dreams of becoming entrepreneurs and we did! She found this new relationship and faith in God that inspired me! She even stopped smoking and the drinking reduced dramatically!
But Irene had to go back home in order to save money and build her dream business, being back in that environment fueled old feelings. Not to mention, building her business was harder than she thought. She had saved almost $30,000 to start her business/live on but after 2 years, all the money was gone. She tried to make her business prosper but she was met with failure after failure and rejection after rejection. Then the relationship that she was in for over 9 years ended with a unforeseen betrayal to her heart. The pain was unbearable, she had lost it all in pursuit of her dreams. She had lost her money, her comfort, her man and her business wasn’t doing what she needed it do. She thought she was doing the right thing because she knew in her heart this business was something God put in her heart to do. But she didn’t think that she would lose it all in the process.
So she went back to that 17 year old girl and those familiar demons of not feeling good enough, feeling alone, feeling rejected were screaming in her mind. She wanted out again, she was tired of the pain, she was tired of the disappointment, she was tired of the financial hardships, she was tired of not having anyone understand her, she was tired of trying. So last year, she went for the pills and started to pop them in her mouth. But this time, something made her throw them back up. While balling in tears in fetal position on her bathroom floor, she let everything out.
I was so worried about my friend but little did I know that she made a decision on that bathroom floor to fight for her destiny. She told me that she realized that she had a Savior who took all the shame and hurt from her and that even though she had experienced trial after trial that she would get up and fight. No devil in hell was going to steal her destiny,
Irene woke up the next day a warrior in God’s army, fighting for her destiny. She decided that she would take full control of the story she wanted to tell. She would be the one to break generational curses of alcoholism, poverty, broken marriages and start generational blessings, a legacy of prosperity, faith, wholeness, happy families, and doing what God had created us to. She lives by this mantra “one monkey won’t stop my show.” She changed her story from a victim to a victor. She knew the story she wanted to tell her grandchildren one day and giving into the lies from her past, the shame or the opposition she faced would no longer be her story.
I looked at Irene in the mirror this morning proud, as my name is Maria Irene Melendez. See I can act like I got it all together, you see my accomplishments but you don’t know my story. We can be fooled in this age of social media to compare ourselves to one another, thinking that everyone else has it all together while we’re suffering behind closed doors. But I am living proof that you are not alone and no matter how bright someone’s smile is or pretty their pictures are, you never know how they are suffering. It’s by the grace of God that I am here today.
Although I had accomplished so much in my life, I was still that broken little 4 year old girl who’s father left her at the park for any stranger to kidnap. I never dealt with my wounds and I masked my insecurities in accomplishments, a career and relationships, looking for meaning until I was stripped of it all and that’s when I learned that before I am anything else, I am a child of God. I never needed anything to approve me because God had already accepted, approved, redeemed, restored and breathed His spirit into me.
So I leave you with this. What story do you want to tell? See we’re taught not to be transparent not realizing that the very thing you struggle with privately, those messes that we all deal with, God can turn into a message – a message of hope and inspiration or to tell someone else “I’ve been there before.”
When you are faced with life’s challenges – the wounds that will come in the form of failures, betrayals, hurts, setbacks, delays – you choose how you will respond by choosing what story you want to tell at the end of your life. Do you want your story to be the one of the woman who was paralyzed by fear so you never stepped out on that dream or you do want to tell the story of the woman who looked her giants in the face and made it happen? Do you want to be the woman who constantly needs the approval of others or do you want to be the woman who knew her worth and never allowed anyone to steal her joy? Do you want your story to be the one who jumped from bed to bed looking for love or do you want to be the woman was so secure in God’s love that her swag brought all the right type of dudes to her? Do you want your story to be that you never wrote that song, wrote that book, starred in that movie, developed that app, performed that surgery, won that case, built that business because it got hard and you gave up? Or do you want to be the one who slayed her goals? Do you want to be the woman who was too afraid to share her story or do you want to be the woman who boldly shares her testimony?
Don’t let your past hold your future hostage. You are not your mistakes, you are not your circumstances, you are not your family drama, you are not the addictions, you are not the depression, you are not those lying thoughts telling you that you’re not good enough!
I want you to embrace the power in your story! You know I’m here to help you too, so you can enroll in my Embracing the Power In Your Story course here to help you gain the confidence to tell your story! I show you how to overcome low self-worth and how to avoid the traps of looking for meaning and validation in things outside of yourself and I’ll show you how to understand who you are, not what you do but who you are.
Don’t sit there any longer, someone is waiting to hear your story.
XOXO,
Maria I. Melendez
Founder
Embrace Her Legacy
@embraceherlegacy
by desing | Faith & Purpose
I don’t know one person who couldn’t use more money. Money is the reason why we get out of bed in the morning and report to jobs we don’t like, deal with co-workers we can’t stand and remain in this cycle until something better comes along.
If I were to give you $1 million, would you take it? Of course you would and so would I! But what I’ve noticed (and we’ve seen this happen before), is that someone can get $1 million today and end up filing bankruptcy next year. We’ve seen this happen to lottery winners, celebrities who shot to fame and anyone in between who didn’t have the character needed to maintain and grow the wealth that was given to them.
That’s because prosperity doesn’t begin in your bank account. It doesn’t begin when your outside circumstances change. Prosperity begins on the inside. Prosperity begins when you start to change your thinking from a poverty-based mindset.
What do I mean by a “poverty based” mindset?
See it doesn’t matter how much money you make or what new job you get, if you still have a poverty based mindset then you’ll never have enough money. What we tend to do when we need more money is think of ways to get a job that pays us more or start changing the pricing strategy of our businesses – which is common sense. However, what difference does it make if you still think thoughts that are rooted in fear, lack and insecurity?
Some of us are waiting for someone to give us something – whether it’s an opportunity, a promotion, a check, a new job or a scholarship. When we don’t get it, we go blaming other people for the lack of our upward mobility. The iconic motivational speaker, Jim Rohn, has this quote “Don’t wish things were easier, wish that you were better.”
Unfortunately, life is not fair and economic disparity runs ramped all over the world. To make matters even worse, we’re not being taught skills to achieve wealth. We’re taught to work harder, study harder and get a good job that will pay you good money. However, there are millions of people who bust their tails off working hard every day and are still riding the poverty line.
Many of us are carrying thousands upon thousands of dollars in student loan debt and millennials account for 40% of the unemployment rate in this country! What’s wrong with picture?
We have to change our relationship with money and our thinking towards money. When you constantly approach money from a place of fear or that you won’t ever have enough – you have a lack based mentality and you will attract such into your life. What I’ve learned is not to put my trust in money but to put my trust in God who will not only supply all of my needs but who expects me to be a steward over the money He gives me. The more you hold tight onto your money like you’ll never get more, the more you’ll attract lack into your life. Start to think of money as a tool, one that there is more than enough to go around. You are to manage your money and not let it manage you.
When I changed my thinking from my employment as my source of income to God as my source, I can now think with abundance because I have an unlimited source. The money or income in my life is no longer limited to what I can work for but to what God can do. Now that doesn’t mean that you’re supposed to be undisciplined with your finances. Anything taken to the extreme is error so don’t expect to run up your credit cards and then expect God to send you a $10,000 check next week. If He were to keep doing that then you wouldn’t learn the lesson of disciplining your spending.
If you’re in a season of lack in your life, don’t get comfortable there either. Just because you fell on hard times, does not mean that these circumstances will be your destiny. Many of us get comfortable in lack and pray little prayers asking God to just get us through the month. You’re passing through a season as we all go through financial hardships but you have to make a decision of how you will choose to respond to this adversity. Like my pastor, Dr. AR Bernard put it, “Adversity is a chance for opportunity.” This adversity may be a chance for you to learn, grow and experience success and achievement. You might be asking God for a new job but what if He gave you an idea that you can turn into a multi-million dollar business? Make up your mind that you will not get comfortable with lack in your life and that you’re going to come out of it.
Then, change the way you approach earning money. You don’t get paid for your time but for your value to the marketplace. Instead of focusing on getting more money, focus on becoming THE BEST at whatever it is that you do. Hone in on what your gifts, talents and abilities are and think of ways that you can translate that into income opportunities. If you focus on using your gifts as a problem solver then you are well on your way to economic success. How can you solve that companies, client’s, woman’s problem? How can you make their lives easier with your gifts, talents and abilities? How can you add more value to that company or client? Now you’re thinking prosperity because it’s not about what you can get but what you can give and in return, you will receive.
I talk about this more in depth in my How to Negotiate Like a Boss course in our Embrace Her Legacy University which you can totally download now and have access to, along with my other courses on the keys to accomplishing your goals, developing a positive mindset, overcoming fear and developing your faith. In the How to Negotiate Like a Boss class, you’ll learn:
- You will learn to identify your skills, assets and abilities to leverage your ask
- You will learn how to kill it in every meeting and walk away with what you want
- If you’re a new to your industry, I will show you specific newbie strategies to get your foot in the game
- Learn how to make sure you have satisfied clients
- Discover your value to the marketplace
- Learn strategies to gain repeat clients
- I will show you how to identify the person who can help you in all negotiations
- Learn how to find out what to charge
- Learn how to get the number you want
- Gain the confidence to charge what you deserve…even if it means walking away
That’s another poverty based thinking – we feel like we never have enough money to invest in ourselves so we rather spend money on immediate pleasures that will never leave us permanently fulfilled. I’ve made this super affordable so that we no longer have excuses…$12 per month. Will you take advantage?
You can build wealth, it just begins in your mind.
