by desing | Faith & Purpose
Let’s face it. Getting rejected can sting! Who in the world enjoys being rejected? Other people can say or do cruel, mean and hurtful things while others are simply sharing their opinion, not really knowing how their words or lack thereof can positively or negatively infect the lives of others. And in this day and age of social media, in which everyone is hiding behind a screen, opinions are getting more and more judgmental and outright mean as we speak.
But here’s the key that we all must understand while on our journey of success:
All good will be attacked.
But here’s the other kicker:
It’s not what happens to you in life; it’s what you do about it.
So it’s safe to say that no matter what you do or how good you do it, someone will ALWAYS have something negative to say about you, your cause or your business. This is a FACT.
Nevertheless, that does not change that it can hurt and if we are not careful we can allow the opinions of others to determine our joy, peace, happiness or self-worth. To that I say, “No more!”
I was at an event recently where I felt compelled in my heart (and I know God enough to know that this is how He usually speaks to me) to share an abusive relationship from my past. I didn’t think about it, I just did what I knew I was supposed to do. But a few minutes after I shared my piece, I started to hear those annoying voices of doubt. “What are these people going to think about me?” or “Should I have said anything?” or “I don’t want anyone to judge me to think that I am weak.”
As soon as those thoughts crept their way into my mind, another set of thoughts took over. “Maria, you are serving God. Is God mad at you for doing this? Does God still love you? Do you believe you were serving God? So why the heck does it matter to you if these people judge you or not. You are serving God and not the opinions of other people.”
I immediately felt better. I knew which voice I needed to listen to. Not to mention, I ended up receiving several different “thank-you’s” from other women who had experienced the same thing but who were too ashamed to share. In that moment, I gave other women courage and here I am worrying about what other people may think of me. Smh…
I share this story with you to show you that the only opinion that mattered at that moment was my own. I could have allowed other people’s “perceived” notions of me to make me feel insecure or unworthy but I refused to.
So what’s the point? On your journey of success, personal development and embracing your legacy, you are going to have plenty of people who will have negative opinions of you. The best thing to do is to accept that as part of the process and remember that your security is never to be contingent upon other’s people opinion or support of you.
People. We are fickle nowadays. One day we support something and the next day we will tear that person’s character apart with hateful words. Getting judged by others is just as certain as winter coming after fall. Just as you prepare for the winter (because unfortunately it is coming), is the same way that you should prepare to deal with negative commentary.
How you deal with it is your business. I deal with it knowing that my worth, security and value comes from God and He is filled with love for me – no matter what I do. He has called me and predestined me. So if I’m good enough for God, then I’m good enough for me. I let Him handle all the naysayers and continue to focus on my journey of becoming better.
I leave you with this. What makes you secure? What makes you whole? Once you love all of who you are, then you can better deal with the opinion of others. Remember that no one else’s opinion of you should ever change your opinion of you.
XOXO,
Maria I. Melendez
@embraceherlegacy
by desing | Faith & Purpose, Tools
“Learn to work harder on yourself than you do on your job. If you work hard on your job you’ll make a living, if you work hard on yourself you can make a fortune.”
That’s the tone that I want to set off for this week’s message.
In the last (24) hours, I have realized just how powerful we are as human beings, I put an emphasis on that word “being” for a special reason because we are all being or becoming who we truly believe we will become. I wholeheartedly believe that you become what you believe, not what you want or desire, but what you truly believe about yourself.
Believing something does not start when we actually “see” the manifested evidence but believing starts in the mind way before we can actually see something. Our minds are the pinnacle of what makes us human beings so darn special and tremendously different from any other living species in this universe. We have the power to think and shape our worlds with our minds because every thing, every action and every successful venture was first manifested in the mind.
I am learning that in order to achieve true success then you have to change what is on the inside of you and that will be the catalyst to change what’s going on outside of you. Instead of trying to change your circumstances, I want you to start thinking about how you can change yourself.
We put so much hard work into our jobs and careers, spending years on educating ourselves, spending countless hours working harder at our jobs, getting up early and leaving late and doing all that is in our power to change our outside circumstance; instead of turning that same energy inward and work on our being, our character, our way of thinking, our way of looking at our circumstances, our philosophy, our attitudes or our gift of communication.
I want to encourage you to make a commitment to start going to work on yourself. How can you become better? How can you become more valuable? That is the major point that I want to stress here – in order to have more, you are going to have to become more. We are all on the journey of becoming and embracing our unique purposes, which we were each beautifully gifted for. I want us all to focus on becoming more – working harder on ourselves that we do on our jobs.
“Maria, so how do I do that?” I am so glad that you asked!
- Make a choice to no longer become easily offended and allow conflict to interrupt your circle of peace. If someone else’s action or lack thereof are interrupting your peace then, my dear, you are giving away too much power. Whatever conflict is going on in your world, community, family, business or job is not to interfere with your inner peace. If someone offends you, then make it water off a ducks back and let it slide off of you. When we focus our energy on being upset with others then that is energy that we are wasting when we can apply that same energy to our personal development.
- Develop a plan to make yourself more valuable. There is a reason someone can make $52 million a year at a company and another can make $20,000 a year. We are not paid for our time; we are paid for our value to the marketplace. I am not saying our value to God, our loved ones or purpose; I am strictly speaking in fiscal terms. Think of ways that you can make yourself more valuable to your company, if you can make your company $1 billion dollars, then you better believe that you are valuable to the marketplace and your salary will be an example of that.
- Be patient. Whether you are stuck in traffic, waiting on the subway train, or waiting for your success to physically harvest – I need for all of us to have a little more patience. Instead of looking at a circumstance with your “impatient” hat, then try to look at it from a different perspective. Perhaps God could be saving you from a fatal accident; that’s why you’re stuck in traffic. Or perhaps you are not ready yet for the success that is in store for you, maybe there is something that you are supposed to learn in your season of “waiting.”
- Don’t wish for less problems, wish for more skill. Instead of wishing or praying the problems away, ask God to give you a strategy or skill set to triumph over and learn from your challenges.
- Check the doubt at the door. The way someone else or a circumstance can have control over you is to instill doubt over you. If you are in a situation where perhaps your business is not making as much money as you thought it would then you may begin to doubt if you are doing the right thing and begin to question yourself. Doubt is another way to control you and fuel negative thinking. Eliminate the doubt from your mind.
- Get a personal development daily routine going. What you do in private determines public performance. Have a routine in place to help you work on yourself daily. It can prayer, exercise, reading motivating material, journaling, learning a new word – whatever it is, get a routine going.
- Define, set and achieve personal development goals. Enroll in leadership training, read a book on a topic that facilitates your personal growth, enroll in a coaching program, study effective communicators. Strive towards investing into yourself to become your best self.
I want you; yes YOU, to become more! Become better and become more valuable. This is an essential factor to defining your one-of-a-kind legacy and attracting the success you desire. You can make a living but you have the potential to make a life that is so great that it impacts generation after generation to come. Which will you choose?
Always embrace your legacy 🙂
XOXO,
Maria I. Melendez
@embraceherlegacy
by desing | Faith & Purpose, Tools
So the other day I read this post that read “6 + 3 = 9 and so does 5 + 4, the way you do things is not always the only way to do them. Respect other people’s way of thinking.” When I say that this was right on time when I read it! I will be candid enough with you to let you know that I have been fighting one of life’s inevitable storms for a few months now and at first, I was struggling big time because I thought my journey of success would be easy, breezy and beautiful. I thought that the red carpet of success would be rolling out for me by now and although others see me as successful, I ultimately define my success and I feel like I have so much further to go.
But lately, I’ve been experiencing a new found peace in my journey. Since I was a child, I always yearned for an extraordinary life with an extraordinary amount of success. And now I am realizing that it will take an extraordinary path to reach my ultimate life goals. Another major culprit that was causing my issues with this life-changing storm in my life was comparing myself to others. I didn’t even notice that I was doing it until one day I stopped and thought about what I was thinking about. Sounds crazy but sometimes we can allow our thoughts to run ramped and determine our moods and actions. We can see others achieve their successes and feel like “When is my time going to come?” For me, it wasn’t even about that. My issue was that I felt like “When will I get to enjoy the fruits of my labor?” or “God, what is taking you so long? How come I can’t enjoy the pleasures of life right now like everyone else? Aren’t I serving you? Where are you? Why is it so hard?”
That’s when I decided to change my thinking. I looked around at the people that were “enjoying the fruits of their labor” and I realized that most of them were not living the life that they wanted; they were still tied to a job or circumstance in life that was not allowing them to become what they truly desire. And it hit me. “Maria, you have been diligent and dedicated and you have proved to yourself that you stand for something. You have gone after your purpose to manifest your dreams in spite of whatever odds you may have faced. You are living in purpose and defining the legacy you want to leave even when it’s making you uncomfortable. You are the essence of what you preach.” I fell into a state of peace which I have never experienced before. So much so that if God were to call me home tomorrow or earlier than I expected, then I would leave in peace knowing that I lived every day standing for something and becoming who I wanted to be so I could honor what God has called me to do. WOW! At my age, not too many people can say that, but I can.
So why did I just tell you all of this? Well, I want you to know this very fact. We are all trying to get to that number 9. Some people will get there by adding 8 + 1; some people will get there by adding 2 + 10 and then subtracting 3. The key is that we are not to judge how others get there and most importantly we are not to judge ourselves either. You equation to get to “9” may look COMPLETELY different from others and that is perfectly fine. If you are not where you want to be then start to embrace the season that you are in. If you are reading this then I am going to go out on a limb and say that you do not desire a mediocre life, one that is said to be reasonable but which is really a mask for fear. You want to live a life of freedom and one that demonstrates to the world that you are living in your purpose, embracing your legacy and manifesting your dreams no matter what the cost. So what if you’re in a rough patch that is a result of you chasing your dreams? Most people are in rough patches and they are not even pursuing their passions. Now I am not saying to judge them, because once again, we are all experiencing our own journey to get to that “9.” Nonetheless, embrace your season of difficulty for your dreams and applaud yourself for courageously going after what YOU want and not what the world tells you is “normal.”
I think that we allow others to define what success is or what “normal” is for us instead of boldly setting our own rules and setting our own precedence.
I leave you with this question. If you were no longer here next month, would you be satisfied with the message that your life sent? Would you feel as though you have accomplished what you wanted in spite of your circumstances? Would you be proud of your legacy? I hope that you would be and if you wouldn’t be then praise the fact that you are still on this earth and you have the power to change that. Utilize what you have access to and if there is any way that I can serve you through any of our purpose living tools or Embrace Her Legacy resources then feel free to see if any of them are a good fit for you.
We are all embracing a new season, one that is usually to provoke change and achievement. I am here to serve you in the best way that I can but it’s ultimately your decision to live in purpose and embrace your legacy!
XOXO,
Maria I. Melendez
@embraceherlegacy
by desing | Faith & Purpose
So I was reading something the other day about the journey of life and how it may not necessarily be about becoming something or someone but “unbecoming” everything that is not really you so you can be who you were meant to be in the first place. I found this powerful because lately I’ve learned to become more comfortable in whom I am not. See, I hold myself and others around me accountable to a certain level of excellence, integrity and character. If you ever came to me for advice, please do not expect me to be one of those people who will tell you what you want to hear, I will tell you what you need to hear – of course, all in love. But as we know, love speaks truth even when it may hurt.
I would fight myself for not being someone who I was not (someone who pacifies and sugar coats the truth) until I started to accept that perhaps God made me this way for a special reason. I am that person in your life that will hold you accountable for everything that you say, do, say that you will do or fail not to do. I started to imagine, “How different would this world be if more of us held each other accountable for our actions or lack thereof?”
Think about it for a second. Let’s say you tell someone that you want to lose (15) pounds by the end of the year and you are set to start a new workout and diet plan come next week Monday. You tell this person that you will work out 3x a week and cut your sugary food intake by 50%. Imagine if that following week, this person called you and asked for an update on your progress and not only does this person call that first week, they begin to call you every week holding you accountable for the goals that you set. You would be way more than likely to accomplish your goals because you know that someone is holding you accountable for it.
Many of us have this mindset of “minding our business” when we see people around us making mistakes but yet we talk about those people and the mistakes they are making with everyone else but that person. How is that really “minding your business?”Please do not confuse what I am saying. I am not telling you to judge others for their failures, or to put your nose all up in people’s lives but if you see a friend who is struggling with a goal, relationship or major decision then instead of talking about them or “leaving it to God,” then why not try becoming an accountability partner for that person. We are a human race and we all have the same basic desires: to be loved, to be accepted, to be understood, to live in purpose, to be at peace. So why not help each other along the way?
Friends tell you what you need to hear and not what you want to hear. When I was miserable at my job at a major record label and complaining to my friend about by misery over dinner, it was her will to tell me about myself and how I had been complaining for over a year that made me look in the mirror at myself and decide to make a change. She held me accountable and had she not done so, I doubt that I would have ever left my job to pursue my purpose.
It is time that you hold yourself accountable and others around you accountable for the things they say that they will do or the things that they do not do. God uses people and no one can fulfill the call of God over their life without other people. This is part of what I do with my coaching clients and part of what my vision coach does for me, hold me accountable and because of that I have grown INCREDIBLY in my vision. If you want to know more about how to work with me as a coach and accountability, then please click here.
So here are some pointers for effective accountability:
- The key factor for change is motivation, not information. If someone is not motivated to change they will not. So do not try to force that on anyone.
- Accountability cannot work effectively if you are operating out of negative emotions like guilt, shame or discouragement, which is what we tend to do. Do not make someone else feel bad but use positive reinforcement to encourage them to do something proactive about their situation. This goes for yourself as well, operate out of your own positive reinforcement not negativity because if you do, the change will not be long-lasting and can even egg on a backwards slope into more negative behavior.
- Accountability relationship is built around 7 principles:
- Voluntary (Someone should want to be held accountable, if they do not want to, then it may fuel unhealthy accountability)
- Positive
- Pre-emptive (Proactive, not reactive)
- Consistent
- Honest
- Specific
- Energizing
Peer accountability with your peers should have:
- A permission to ask
- A clearly defined question to ask when holding each other accountable. Develop and write down the question you want your friend to ask you
- Structure – define when and how often accountability will be provided.
I challenge you to get an accountability partner and if you want to learn more about how I can support you through accountability via Vision Coaching or Goal-Setting please feel free to learn more here. As always, it’s my honor to serve!
XOXO,
Maria I.Melendez
@embraceherlegacy
by desing | Faith & Purpose, Tools
So most of you know that every week I send out my “legacyism” messages that are created to empower, motivate and inspire you. My messages are usually influenced by something that I am currently dealing with or have dealt with – which is how I work most of the time as I like to speak from personal experiences.
This week I decided to switch things up a bit and I recorded a video for this week’s post.
One of our biggest setbacks in life can be the wrong relationship. I believe that relationships can make you or break you and you cannot effectively honor the call over your life if you have a slew of unhealthy relationships in your life. Honey, you are worth so much more! And trust me when I say that I have been there, done that and go the t-shirt!
You have to know the difference between those people who are assigned to you and those people who are attached to you. People who are attached to you are those soul-sucking folks that take away from your life and do not add anything. They eat at your peace, well-being and spirit. Every time you deal with this person you are more tired and frustrated then invigorated. Simply put – they are like leeches sucking at your soul.
Then there are those people that have been assigned to you. God works through people to ultimately achieve His will. There are people who have been assigned to you for whatever reason it may be. Perhaps it is to encourage, motivate or inspire or perhaps it’s simply to put a smile on their face. Some people are assigned to us for our growth, for a moment in time, for a season or for a lifetime. There are people who are waiting for you to use your gifts, talents, skills and abilities to serve them – this is the essence of living in purpose.
So I want you to take an inventory of the relationships in your life. Is there someone who has been attaching themselves to you that you need to let go? Are there people who perhaps have been assigned to you? Are there people who you can serve?
Even if you may not know who has been assigned to you, I want to challenge you to live daily in an awareness as to who you can be of service to. You don’t have to do anything extravagant, sometimes it can be as simple as listening to someone, being a great friend, sharing words of wisdom to someone at the office or helping someone with their grocery bags.
I share more about this in this week’s video post so I hope that you have a chance to watch it here. Feel free to comment on the video with any questions and I will do a follow-up video post with answers. Thank you so much for joining me on this journey and I hope that I can help you embrace your legacy in any way that I can!
As always, it’s my honor to serve!
Maria I. Melendez
@embraceherlegacy
by desing | Faith & Purpose, Tools
On my journey of embracing my legacy and pursuing my purpose instead of taking the “safe” route, faith has been the rock that I thought I stood on until recently. For the past few months, I have been forced to walk by faith in a way that I have never been challenged to before and it got me to thinking. Prior to this season of my life where challenges were not as “challenging” for lack of a better word, I believed that I “walked by faith” until it hit me that I really wasn’t because you really will not know what faith is until it’s all that you have to stand on. When life throws its curveballs, this is when the true testimony of walking by faith will reach its climax.
It’s easy to tell others to have faith and walk by faith and not by sight, but when it is your turn to do so, it may not be as easy. I am firm believer that I am serving God and serving others in my journey as an entrepreneur and “midwife to your legacy,” but I have yet to experience a time in my life where I literally had nothing else to stand on but faith.
Walking my faith is not always a pretty sight. There are moments in your life where your faith will be challenged and tested but it’s for you to grow. I am a believer in God of the Bible and Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior but this is not about me trying to preach the gospel to you, this is about living in honor and submission to your calling even when your faith is being tested to the point that your faith is no longer rock solid faith, but struggling faith.
You’re trying to pay your bills and the money isn’t there. You’re trying to make a vision come to pass but the resources are not there and nowhere to be found in sight. You’re biological clock is ticking and your future husband hasn’t even come close to showing up. You’re hoping that your loved one will be healed of whatever illness that he or she is battling but the doctor’s reports are getting worse. You want to quit your job to pursue your dreams but your fears are only getting louder.
These situations are just a few of the myriad ways that walking by faith can look like.
Oftentimes, we can be misled to believe that walking by faith will guarantee only seasons of abundance. Or better yet we think that we are the only ones who struggle with faith when challenges arise. I am here to tell you differently. You will not know what faith really is until it is all that you have to stand on. Walking by faith will not always be easy and it will look crazy at times. You may even be ridiculed by others when doing so but you have to be willing to endure the process of success if you want to experience the benefits of the outcome. I want you to keep the faith in spite of whatever you may be going through because getting through this time will prepare you to get through life’s next storm.
If your faith is currently being tested, please know that you are not alone! I am in that same boat too, walking on water, trying to keep my eyes focused on God’s power and not my own. I too have doubted, struggled with faith and even thought about giving up several times but there is something on the inside of me that will not allow me to do it. I am walking by faith even when no one around me thinks that I am making the wise decision to do so, however, I know now that I am walking truly by faith. So trust me when I say that I know how challenging walking by faith can be but we have to be willing to do it so that our faith can be strengthened and we can be able to tell others “I’ve been there before.”
So how have I been getting through it? Like this:
- Take it one day at a time. Allow tomorrow to worry about itself and focus on today. Even if you need to take it one hour at a time, then do so.
- Let go. Stop trying to figure it all out. Focus on doing your best and allowing God to do the rest; once you let things go that is usually when the magic unfolds. And magic has been happening by the way that I cannot wait to share!
- Stay focused on the end result by getting a mental picture. I try to focus on how life will be after the storm is over after I have received the deliverance; that keeps me going.
- Keep an attitude of gratitude. Instead of focusing on what you do not have, focus on what you do have.
- Change the plan. If the goal isn’t manifesting the way that you thought that it would, don’t change the goal; change the strategy to get there.
Walking my faith may have it’s challenges, but just because things may not be working out does not mean that things aren’t going the way that they are supposed to. Embrace that for a moment and please know that you are not alone. Remember that faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.
Faith AND patience will obtain the promise in the end. Remain faithful, patient and grateful 🙂
XOXO,
Maria I. Melendez
@embraceherlegacy
by desing | Faith & Purpose, Tools
Money. It’s something that is synonymous with power and respect and has all been called “the root of all evil.” However, whether we like to admit it or not having a substantial amount of money can make our lives less challenging. If you are surprisingly let go from your job, become ill or need to pay for your children’s education – having a good stash of money can help ease your mind as you face life’s unsuspecting trials that require us to have some sort of savings to pull through those rough moments.
Let’s face it, we ALL could use a little more cash in our pockets unless you are millionaire reading this and if you are then GREAT; please tell us how you did it. We all need money to survive but as I have mentioned before, poor thinkers focus their thoughts on survival and great thinkers focus their thoughts on progression. One way to ensure that you will never be rich is to stick to one income stream. It is very hard to become wealthy by simply collecting a weekly check from your job. It is essential to create additional income streams for yourself. Before you try to tell me that this is a message of greed, let me tell you that when you have money you can use it to create change, serve and impact the lives of others. That business you want to launch, the non-profit you want to start in your community, that new house you want to by, that school you want to send your kids to, that life insurance policy you desire, that healthcare you would like to have all require money. I am NOT saying to be a slave to money because I believe that the love of money is the root to all evil. If you chase money, then you will never have enough of it and you will never be at peace.
There is nothing wrong with creating different income streams for yourself to provide the best future for yourself and your family. I always say, “You are the leader of your life and you have the power to lead your life from average to optimal.” This means that you have the gifts, talents and abilities on the inside of you to create the life that you want. So here is what I want you to do.
Instead of asking yourself, “How can I make more money?” – I want you to ask yourself “How can I use my gifts, talents and abilities to serve others and in turn generate more income for myself?” The latter is about using what you are good at to serve others instead of solely focusing on yourself. This is NOT about getting more money to get rich quick, this about using the principle of service and purpose to create the life that God has called you to live. There is nothing wrong with having things, just as long as you do not allow them to have you.
The next step that I want you to take is writing it down. Sit down with a pen and notebook and write down what strengths, skills and gifts you have and ideas as to how you can use them to serve others and generate additional income. I want you to be selfless and think about how can be of best service to others. Perhaps you have a knack for writing – well maybe you can help people edit their resumes or you can write blog posts that inspire people. Perhaps you have insane organizational skills, well then maybe you can be someone’s virtual assistant for a few hours out of the week. Get my drift ladies?
The final step that I want to you to take is to write down goals and possible strategies in regards to bringing those ideas forth. If you do not know where to start, then pray and ask God to give you the strategy. Oftentimes, we pray for a miracle to fall out of the sky, nonetheless, sometimes actions get the miracle. You have to position yourself in the right place to receive the miracle and prepare for what you prayed for. Thinking and speaking positively are important too, but there is a power in writing down your goals because it is the first physical manifestation of the thought which invigorates you to pursue the goal.
I sincerely hope that this message has been a blessing to you and that you can use this message as a catalyst to leading your life from average to optimal. I am here to serve you and if you need any further assistance in identifying your gifts to serve others to create additional income streams then please feel free to reach out to me for a 1-on-1 Goal Setting Skype Call. I want to help you WIN so if this is something that seriously interests you then please feel free to find out more here 🙂
Also, I wanted to let you know that I am also going to be hosting a FREE “Love Your Legacy Google Hangout” on Tues. Aug 19th at 8pm EST discussing the power of your story, manifesting your God-given dream, living in purpose and defining your legacy! The first person to register and attend the event will win a FREE copy of my book Love Your Legacy: How to UnMask Your Truth to Discover Your Purpose and Birth Your Vision. There will be other exclusive offers for those who attend so I am looking forward to hanging out with you then, you can register here.
As always, it’s my honor to serve!
Warmest Regards,
Maria I. Melendez
Founder and CEO
@EmbraceHerLegacy
by desing | Faith & Purpose, Tools
We hear the term “life is short” but sometimes that does not hit home until we have some sort of tragedy occur in our lives that oftentimes will take the life of a loved one, friend or relative. These past few days have opened my eyes to what it really means to live and I want to share it with you.
This past Saturday night, I went to bed with such an overwhelming feeling of gratitude. I magnified all that I did have in my life instead of what I did not and for the first time I felt rich. I was filled with thanksgiving as I meditated on the blessings of my life. My life has not been an easy journey but it is one that I am proud to say that is mine and I am grateful. The next day, I was bombarded with the news that a family friend lost her battle to cancer and unfortunately passed away. My heart sank…
After receiving the news and sharing the news with the rest of my family, I went for a much needed walk. Oddly, the sun never shined brighter on my face and I felt an indescribable connection to life. My emotions were mixed – sad, angry, joyful and hopeful. All I kept thinking was how we can major in the minor things in life only to have this valuable thing called “life” taken away sooner than we think. All the hours of worrying, being angry, being unforgiving, being resentful, being fearful are actually a HUGE waste of our time. Time is one thing that we all have but also one thing that we can never get back once it’s gone.
We all think that we have more time. Nevertheless, the truth of the matter is that, how do you really know that you have more time? So this is what I am getting at here – take advantage of every day that you have. If there is someone that you need to forgive, then do it. If there is a goal or dream that you want to achieve then do it. If there is someone that you need to ask forgiveness of, then do so. If there is a truth that you need to speak, then honor your truth. If there is a place that you want to visit, then put the vacation on your calendar and go.
You can sit around and get upset about what you do not have or you can tap into your riches and praise God for what you do have. If you cannot find one thing, be thankful that you are alive and you can tell your loved ones “I love you,” because there is someone who wasn’t able to do it today or there is someone who wished that they could hear their loved one say it to them one last time.
Life can be flipped upside down in an instant and in those moments we have to learn to surrender to that process. As for me, I am learning to accept the transitions in life. I am learning that me becoming a woman who is “rich” has nothing to do with my possessions and I am living each day to the best of my ability. To live is to love, to live is to forgive, to live is to be thankful for each blessing and lesson learned, to live is to learn from our mistakes, to live is to be courageous, to live is be intentional, to live is honor our purpose.
I don’t know how much longer I have left, but I am committed to staying focused on what I have been called to do and embracing the journey and all the people I build relationships with along the way. I hope that I can inspire you to do the same.
Live. Forgive. Love.
Maria I. Melendez
Founder & Chief Executive Officer
@EmbraceHerLegacy
by desing | Faith & Purpose
Lately I’ve been digging into my vault of personal development books and one that I am paying closest attention to right now is “Thinking For a Change” by John Maxwell – which is highly recommended for one of your summer reads. One quote that has resonated with me the most was this:
Unsuccessful people focus their thinking on survival.
Average people focus their thinking on maintenance.
Successful people focus their thinking on progress.
Exactly what I needed to read at the moment…
If you’re reading this right now, I can safely assume that you are someone who desires to live life in purpose and who desires to define the legacy that you want to leave. If you know me, you know that one of my greatest grievances is to see people so focused on survival that they forget to choose to birth their God-given dreams. Oftentimes, we can get so caught up into day-to-day survival and maintenance that we can forget to think about how to progress, grow and achieve our big goals. It has been proven that the one quality that all successful people attain is the quality of being a great thinker. Everything begins in thought form which turns into an experience.
Focusing strictly on survival and maintenance can be a HUGE distraction from you achieving your dreams. Once you can be distracted, you can be deceived, then you can be dislocated and ultimately be destroyed. I know that it can be tough to achieve a dream or work towards a major goal, especially when your resources are limited. Nevertheless, when your resources are limited, this is a great chance for you to get resourceful, get creative and make your dreams happen with what you have instead of what you lack.
It’s time to think progress instead of focusing on surviving. Life is more than our bills or day-to-day superficiality where we praise Fridays and lament Mondays. I want you to focus on your big vision that you have for yourself and I want you to think about the progressive steps that can help you get there. Here are some tips:
- Think of who or what you have access to right not that can help you achieve your goals. There is ALWAYS someone or something. Start to build your plan from there, reach out to that person.
- If you need a freelancer for things like graphic design, logo design, web copy, web design and more, check out Fiverr.com where you can hire freelancers to do various jobs for you for $5. (There are possible add-ons for each job but it’s REALLY inexpensive and each job starts at $5!)
- Barter your services. Let’s say that you’re a make-up artist and you need to create a portfolio with images of your work. Instead of complaining about not being able to afford a photographer, how about finding a photographer who needs new images for their portfolio and you guys exchange your services. He needs a MUA, you need a photographer – work it out together.
- Brainstorm your tail off! Look at your goals written down in front of you and think about what you can start doing now to make it happen. Perhaps you want to publish a book and think that you will not be able to because you do not have a publisher. You can find ways to self-publish. If you can afford an order of (200) books, then focus on what you can afford.
- Google all free or inexpensive resources that you have access to. There are so many workshops, events and services available at local libraries, churches or non-profit organizations. Know what’s in your town and make it happen!
If you’ve been so focused on surviving or maintaining, then I want you to make a change and commit to thinking progressively. I want you to get resourceful for your dreams and MAKE IT HAPPEN! We can get resourceful when it comes to surviving but will not apply a progressive thinking to our dreams.
I leave you with one of my favorite songs by the lovely Mariah Carey “Make It Happen” – make this your anthem this week and always embrace your legacy!
XOXO,
Maria I. Melendez
@embraceherlegacy
by desing | Faith & Purpose
A few weeks ago someone sent me a link of a recent graduation keynote speech of Jim Carrey’s. To my shock, that was actually the second time in a few weeks where someone was sharing a “Jim Carrey motivational moment” with me. I have learned enough in life to know that there are no such things as coincidences. I admit that Jim Carrey, who we all love for being the “laugh until you hurt” comic, would be the last place I would expect to find motivation. Not only was I motivated by his speech, I felt like I was listening to someone who absolutely understands what it means to live in purpose and do what you love in spite of what odds one may be up against. A big lesson here is to never judge who can be carrying your next piece of motivation, encouragement, wisdom or understanding.
Anyhoot, there is a special component of the speech that I want to touch upon. He talks about his father whose dream was to be a stand-up comic but because of the standard dream killers (need of a job, need to make a living, need to support my family etc), he decided to take the safe route as an accountant. A few years into his position, he unfortunately lost his job. He and his family had to learn to fend for themselves and were left broke and struggling after his job loss. Growing in wisdom from that situation, Jim Carrey goes on to make this extremely valid point. “My father’s situation showed me that you can fail at something you do not want, so why not try doing something that you love?” Following that, he says another key point. “People oftentimes make decisions rooted in fear under the guise of practicality.”
I am saying all sorts of “Amens”, “Say that again!” and “Yasssss!” as I am hearing him speak. How many times have I seen people say that they are doing the practical thing but what they are actually doing is living in fear? Dozens! The better question here is – are you one of those people? Last I checked, no one who is practical leaves a legacy that is one to remember. Being a woman who is embracing her legacy is going to require moments where you will have to go against the grain and do the impractical thing. Don’t you know that those moments of doing what is not practical are the very moments of your story that will stand out and be of positive reinforcement to others? Fear shows up looking like practicality; actually fear shows up looking like all sorts of things in our lives and if we are not careful then we can allow it to subconsciously rule our thoughts, actions, character and lives.
When I am dealing with those moments in which I am being “impractical” but following my gut and that still voice on the inside of me, I remember that I am serving God and not others people opinion of me. I understand that our loved ones can get concerned, but at the end of the day it is your life and not theirs. You have to lead your life the way that you see fit and make decisions that are not rooted in fear.
If you are struggling with fear to pursue what it is that you love then I want you to remember this. You can choose to be practical and still end up failing at that practical option you choose or you can decide to take a shot at doing something that you love. Our lives should not be enjoyed simply on weekends, days off or vacations, we have the power to make a change and create a life where every morning we wake up excited, knowing that we are living in purpose and doing what we love instead of doing what we have to do.
As always, it’s my honor to serve!
Watch the full speech here.
XOXO,
Maria I. Melendez
@embraceherlegacy
