by desing | Our Legacy, Tools
If you want to know what we do…simply put we inspire women and girls to live purpose-driven lives with an intention of the legacy they want to leave. We are here to promote women and girls being confident, fearless, secure and whole with a future so bright that it scares her! Watch our world because Embrace Her Legacy is here and we are NOT looking back!
Who We Are
Embrace Her Legacy is company that offers media, events, community and social initiatives designed to help women and girls intentionally build a purpose-driven legacy.
What We Do
We propel women and girls to live in their purpose with passion and define the legacy they will leave behind. In a time when technology allows us to constantly connect and communicate globally, it is increasingly important to be conscious of the imprint we make on the world. Since inception in 2012, we have serviced hundreds of women and girls throughout New York City and around the country. We evoke feminine confidence through engaging media developed to educate and inspire, tailored events, uplifting community efforts and an advisory board of established and empowered women who are embracing their legacies and share their secrets of success through the Embrace Her Legacy Assembly.
by desing | Tools
I am FILLED with my “isms” because a few years ago life began to smack me upside of my head and I had no choice but to start listening. I began to pay attention to life with a new eye of insight. Honestly, before that I was just existing and doing what I thought I was supposed to do. I was allowing life to happen to me, I was not dictating life.
In response to that realization, I began this life-long spiritual and self-reflection journey. Reading the books, spending time alone, getting uncomfortable and pushing myself to new places. In that time, I have learned sooooooooooo much about life, character, fears, shame, pride, pain, joy, peace, relationships and too much more that I can’t recall right now. I have plenty of “teachers” who have helped me along the way and please understand that this woman who is writing this is a total contrast from the girl I used to be.
So after all the learning I’ve done, I now see myself teaching. Maya Angelou has this quote that goes, “When you learn, teach.” That is exactly why I do. I am a teacher with quite the wisdom to share because I have been there, I have fallen, I have had to pull myself back up and do the work. I am just like you.
Each week I send out motivating, inspirational and sometimes brutally honest emails that are created to provoke you to be your best you while keeping up with all things Embrace Her Legacy. Each email is carefully written and is usually a reflection of something I have experienced or am currently experiencing.
Of course I would love for you to join in and check out what I have to say, I promise that I won’t bite 😉
Interested in getting my legacyisms, then join on in below!
by desing | Our Media
by desing | Faith & Purpose
So many of us live in such a constant blur of stress and to do lists that we don’t really experience the days we go through, let alone take the time to appreciate all the good things we have in the midst of the stress and chaos. Keeping a gratitude list is a great way to remind yourself how good you’ve really got it, and to transform even the most frazzled and frustrated of moods into something positive.
How to Create Your Own List
There is no one way to create a gratitude list. Some people like to keep one running list they can carry in their wallet or tack up on the fridge to give them a boost whenever things start getting stressful. Other people like to write a new list each day to give themselves fresh perspective. Here are two of my favorite gratitude list rituals:
Bed-Time Gratitude
If you’re the sort that has trouble getting to sleep because your mind is racing with all the things you didn’t get done and all the things you’ll have to do the next day, this ritual is perfect for you. It’s like counting sheep, except every sheep is something lovely and uplifting that leaves you feeling relaxed and happy when you finally drift off to dreamland.
Each night, after you’ve turned off your light and nestled down under the covers, let your mind wander across all the things from the day that you’re grateful for. It could be anything from your family to the day’s warm weather to the parking space you got right in front of work—nothing is too big or too small. If one thing in particular really touches you, allow yourself to dwell on it and the happy feelings it evokes as long as you like. Focusing on positive thoughts as you fall asleep is a great way to quiet your mind, let go of the stress of the day, and wake up feeling refreshed and reenergized.
Wake-Up Gratitude
Many of us wake up with a laundry list of all the tasks we have to tackle already running through our heads. Instead of getting yourself worked up before you’re even out of bed, try this instead:
As you lay in bed, still all warm and cozy, think of 3 things—just 3 things—that you’re grateful to have in your life today. Your health. Your home. The yummy leftovers you have in the fridge from your favorite restaurant—again, nothing is too big or too small. In fact, including the “insignificant” things we have to be grateful for can open us up to realizing how many little opportunities we have to be happy throughout the day.
Retraining Your Mind (and Your Mood)
The simple truth is that the kind of day you have depends largely on the filter through which you view the world. By getting into the habit of looking for the things you have to be grateful for, you start to reframe your entire perspective. You begin to really appreciate your blessings instead of taking them for granted. You’re better able to handle stress and disappointment because you’re plugged in to just how much you have to be thankful for. You learn to look on the bright side of things.Give it a try yourself! I guarantee it will change the quality of your days for the better.
by desing | Classes, Our Media
In this special “Beauty Hour” edition, we learn how to make a bright lip work for you no matter what skin tone you may have. Be daring and make a bright lip a new normal, hosted by our special guest and celebrity make-up artist, Shameika Bowman. Special thank you to IMAN Cosmetics for sponsoring awesome products for this special episode of our “Beauty Hour.”
by desing | Tools
You are not alone…you wake up one morning and your credit cards are maxed out, or close to being maxed out and you wonder how it happened. More people find themselves juggling credit card debt and become overwhelmed because they are not sure how to manage it or pay it off. So, how should you begin to deal with paying off credit card debt?
First, you need to get REAL. Be honest with yourself about how you got to the point of drowning in debt. Was it the pair of shoes you had to have? Too many dinners out with friends? Whatever the reason, you will have to be determined to get the debt under control. Here are a few life preserver ideas to keep you from drowning.
- Pay off the card with the highest interest rates first. The higher a debt’s interest rate the more it costs you in interest per dollar of debt. You’re wasting money that you could be saving.
- Pay more than the minimum payment. The problem with only paying the minimum payments is that the payments go mostly toward the interest and don’t reduce your actual card balance. Banks hope that you will only make the minimum payments because the longer you take to pay off the debt the more interest they make.
- Re-negotiate the terms with your existing creditors. Ask them for a lower interest rate. This will be challenging if you have been late on payments in the past. If they are unwilling to lower the interest rate, ask them for a new lower repayment schedule.
- Move high interest balances to lower interest cards if there is room. If your cards are maxed out pay the minimum on all of your cards except the one with the lowest interest rate. Pay this card off faster and transfer the other cards debt to that card. Check promotional offers with lower interest rates to transfer balances to. Make sure to examine offers which are enticing and stick to your plan of paying off your debt.
- Use your savings. Not the best sounding option but the reality is that a savings account is not earning enough to make up for the 12%-35% interest rate you are paying on credit cards. Make sure to keep some funds in the account for emergencies.
- Do NOT borrow from your 401K account. The drawbacks outweigh the positives. The interest and penalties make this an unattractive way to pay off debt.
- If you own a home consider a home equity loan, but don’t make the mistake of paying off credit card debt and keeping the accounts open. Close all but one card and only use that card when you have the money to pay it off when the monthly statement arrives.
- Depending on how large the debt, consider borrowing the money from family and friends. Make sure to put in writing how you plan to repay the loan.
If you find that your options are limited and you are unable to utilize the above life preserver methods, then as a last resort file bankruptcy. This should be an absolute last resort. There are two types of bankruptcy: Chapter 7 and Chapter 13. Make sure to educate yourself before deciding which one is best for you.
Remember that you have to be determined to not only pay off credit card debt but also to stay out of credit card debt.
by desing | Faith & Purpose
It’s a classic sitcom scenario that too many people can relate to—the idea that the longer you’re in a relationship, the less exciting and more mundane it becomes. The “honeymoon” phase dies off. You start to take each other for granted. All those fuzzy feelings and special little moments disappear into a blur of errands and work and ho-hum stress.
But they don’t have to. Here are just a few of the many ways you can keep your love alive and well, no matter how long you’ve been in your relationship:
Say “thank you.”
You may make a point of saying “I love you” when you leave for work every morning, but often do you thank your partner—especially for the things they do on a regular basis? Sure, maybe your husband cuts the lawn every Sunday morning. But how nice would it be for him to be sincerely thanked for it? How would you feel to hear him vocalize how much he appreciates you driving the kids to school every morning?
The routine is only routine if we take it for granted. Make a point of realizing everything your partner does for you, and let them know how much it means to you, and suddenly the simplest of daily chores becomes an expression of love.
Compliment
We accept it as a given that our partner finds us attractive, thinks we’re smart, likes our jokes. That’s why they’re with us. But it’s still nice to be told these things every now and then. A simple compliment, unsolicited and with no ulterior motive, can turn around your partner’s whole day. So make it a regular habit to pick out the things you love about them, and tell them so.
Have silly rituals
Just like you used to keep inside jokes with your best friends in school, having inside rituals and references can keep your relationship intimate—and playful, which is an element many long-term relationships begin to lack.
Whether it’s pet names, catch phrases, or random rituals, cultivate a sense of fun and camaraderie by creating those wonderful things that “no one else gets.” It reinforces the world that you and your partner share and keeps things fun, especially when times get stressful.
Hug it out
Kiss, cuddle, hold hands at the grocery store—for no special reason. You know, all that cutesy stuff you used to do when you were head over heels for each other. Physical contact is proven to create feelings of intimacy and to relieve stress—two things every strong relationship thrives on. If your partner isn’t the overly amorous type, try less love-dovey actions like giving them a back rub at the end of a long day (and asking for one in return!)
Give spontaneous gifts
They don’t need to be the wrapped kind. Make your partner their favorite meal, just because. Leave a mushy love note on the bathroom mirror so they’ll find it when they wake up in the morning. Pack a picnic lunch and drive your partner to the park without telling them where you’re going or what the plan is. Little, unexpected gestures can inject some romance and specialness into the most ordinary of days.
Grow as individuals
This one may seem a little counterintuitive, but allowing each other some space and “me” time to explore your own interests will help you stay strong as a couple. Part of the exhilaration of falling in love is getting to know your partner and discovering all their layers and nuances. Allow each other to thrive as individuals, and you’ll never find yourself in that awkward situation where you have nothing to talk about at a restaurant.
Date nights
Yes, that’s the go-to solution. But that’s because they work, especially if you’re normally wrapped up in work and kids and errands. Schedule alone time on the calendar just like you would any other event, and stick to that commitment.
Spice it up
How you do this is between you, your partner, and your bed sheets, but one of the biggest complaints long-term couples have is that sex becomes obligatory, routine, and boring. So try something different. Ask your partner what they’d be interested in trying, and be willing to share your ideas. You never know what might happen…
by desing | Faith & Purpose, Our Media, Tools
Just like corporate organizations, it is essential to your legacy to have a personal mission statement for your life. It will keep you in check and help you make the best decisions for your life according to your goals, values and standards. I want you to check this video out and feel free to share your personal mission statement.
by desing | Tools
We know the placebo effect can work for medical issues. Some of the participants in a drug study are given a placebo instead of the wonder drug being tested, and yet they see the same positive results as those who receive the drug. It’s a matter of our mind manifesting positive beliefs into actual results. The mind can do incredible things.
But did you know that the placebo effect can also work to trick yourself into feeling more confident than you actually are? This is partially because the more we “fake” confidence, the more we’re able to get through difficult situations and the more we see positive responses from the people around us—which results in us having more actual confidence. It also works because a lack of confidence can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Anyone who’s gone into a meeting terrified they’ll make a mistake can tell you that they probably did wind up doing something wrong, simply because they were so nervous.
So, how do you act confident in situations where you’re anything but? Here are some simple, but effective, ways I’ve found to “fake it till you make it”:
Smile. It’s been scientifically proven that the physical act of smiling can make us feel happier. When you smile, your body releases endorphins, the chemical that makes us feel pleasure. The simple muscle memory of smiling (something you do when you’re happy) can also trick your brain into feeling better. Plus, smiling gives you an approachable, easygoing appearance that can make people respond to you more positively—and better responses can lead to you feeling better about yourself.
Dress for success. If you have a big business presentation you’re petrified of giving, or if you just feel “blah” today and want to give your attitude a kick start, choose one of your favorite, most flattering outfits. Feeling put together can radically change how capable you feel, as well as giving other people the impression that you’re in control.
Watch your posture. Even if you feel like shrinking into the corner, stand up straight and look people in the eyes. Avoid nervous or defensive postures like crossing your arms or hunching your shoulders. And don’t fidget!
Forget about yourself. I get especially nervous and self-conscious when meeting new people for the first time. I worry that I’ll say something stupid or that I won’t have anything to say at all, and I get so wrapped up in my own head that inevitably my premonitions come true. Then I heard the fantastic tip that good conversation is all about making the other person feel interesting. So forget about what you have to say and ask the other person about themselves. Be genuinely interested and invested in what they have to say. They’ll walk away thinking you were an excellent conversationalist, and the more you focus on them, the less you’ll have time to worry about how you’re performing.
Laugh it off. If you do wind up doing something embarrassing or making a mistake, don’t let it totally unravel the confidence you’ve built up so far. Do something that truly confident people do when they have the occasional mishap: Laugh it off. It will take the pressure off you and put your companions at ease by showing them that you’re still on top of things, no big deal. Everyone makes mistakes. It’s how you handle them that shows your true capability.
Remember the times you made it through. The more you practice confidence, the more successes you’ll start to see. When you find yourself in a situation that freaks you out, call up memories of those successes—when you nailed that presentation in spite of your nerves, or when that new person you were so anxious about meeting wound up becoming a good friend. Confidence can be built, and every time you work to get through a nerve-racking situation, you add another notch of confidence to your belt until one day, you find you don’t need to fake it at all anymore!
About Kelly Gurnett
Kelly Gurnett, a.k.a. “Cordelia,” runs the blog Cordelia Calls It Quits, where she documents her attempts to rid her life of the things that don’t matter and focus more on the things that do. You can follow her on Twitter and Facebook and check out her ebook here. She also offers her services as a blogger extraordinaire to those in need of some bloggy awesomeness.
by desing | Faith & Purpose
Journaling. Similar to the “Dear Diary” days of your teens – minus the hormonal dramatics, add a splash of focus and a twist of purpose. I know, I know…there are a thousand reasons as to why you can’t or don’t have time. It’s not easy to just sit down and start writing, nor is it easy to carve out quiet time to compose your thoughts into words but usually that’s exactly what’s need to get started – to just sit, and write. Procrastination allows you to justify not keeping promises to yourself; it tells you, that YOU are not worth YOUR own time!
Fall in love and stay in love with you, make it a priority. Journaling is a great way to self-express fully and truthfully. You can write down everything you’ve ever wanted to say, everything you’ve ever done, and everything you’ve ever experienced. You can fill it with dreams and aspirations that you want to come true or you can simple write down everything your grateful for. This is a personal space that is uniquely yours; designed by you, for you. Journaling is the best free gift you can give yourself.
By simply putting your ideas on paper, “thinking on paper”, is the doorway to a clearer mind, focused decision making, dream realization and an unbelievable increase in self-esteem. Find a bound journal that you like — a pretty cover, your favorite color, or a plain jacket that you can decorate yourself. Check to see if the pages are lined (some folks prefer more freedom of creativity than lined paper allows). If not concerned with frills and aesthetics, you may be satisfied with a simple spiral-bound notebook.
Keep your journal on your bedside stand. Before you turn off the lights for the night, write a minimum of five self-compliments in the journal; any and every compliment counts here. Whatever makes you feel good, from a good hair day, facilitating a productive meeting at work, to cooking an awesome meal for your friends and family. Before long you’ll realize (along with everyone else) how smart, healthy, considerate and good-looking you are.
You’ll find it’s worth improving. You are worth the efforts of sufficient sleep, a healthy diet, an exercise plan, a relaxing vacation, a less stressful (and more fun) job… the list goes on and on.
You’re worth it all, baby! You’ll see.
